do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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