with your own penis?
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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