google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
