I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize