ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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