as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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