Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
