She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
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