i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
