Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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