Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
A+ Viking dick
I would fuck him just for his dog
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize