so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
