I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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