I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
