Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
