Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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