If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
