she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
