I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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