Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
