That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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