so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
i love accidental penises.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
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