This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize