Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Your cock deserves a montage
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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