you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I am naked and annoyed.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
