dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
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He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
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You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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