put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
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is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
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My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works