is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.