Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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