I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Such a big mess for such a small penis
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
