and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
no. you can't hotbox the world.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
