I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
