i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Will exercising make me less horny?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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