youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
