The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
