We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Randomize