I am in a vortex of obligation.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
