thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
