we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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