I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize