it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
