Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
