is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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