Non-Jews are for practice
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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