I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
