I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
