Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
