she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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