Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize