WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
