i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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