can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
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