worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Randomize
