Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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